11-B: The Noisy Neighbor by David Connor & E.F. Mulder

Author:David Connor & E.F. Mulder [Mulder, David Connor and E.F.]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Published: 2021-06-21T00:00:00+00:00

Chapter 10

Eee-er, eee-er, eee-er, eee-er.

The plumber had been on premises around forty-five minutes.

Thud!

Thud!

Thud!

It had taken Warwick five of those to write up a posterboard sign almost three feet square. Please Accept My Apology For The Racket I Made And Also A Tasty Treat. Dom, 11-B.

Warwick also added some music notes and a heart just because.

Then, he tore that corner off.

He ran the sign downstairs, set it up, grabbed another éclair, and when he returned…

Eee-er, eee-er, eee-er.

“Damn, Mr. O’Brien! At least the cable guy did his work first.”

Pianos didn’t go eee-er, eee-er. Everyone knew that. Only one thing made that sound in that way, and Warwick couldn’t get the imagery that sound conjured out of his head.

“I have yet to hear a single note come from a piano,” he said up there to Lawrence. “Ross and the plumber get to make mattress music, and I’m invited to tickle the ivories?”

“At least you were invited for something. Maybe Do, Re, Mi would turn into eee-er, eee-er.”

“Rubbish. Bollocks!”

“Got another one?”

“Utter tosh!”

“That’s my Brit.”

Warwick wondered if Dom was in the closet. Was Penny his beard? Did she maybe have an inkling, but preferred to live in denial? It was a sticky wicket, for certain. A delicate situation. And as Warwick had determined before, it was absolutely none of his business.

Still, he had sympathy for both of them—Dom, if he was forced to live his life as a lie, and also Penny, if she didn’t know she was living one.

In just that one day, there was the plumber, and then, sure enough, an Abbot and Costello type duo from Sears, who arrived well within their delivery window, just about three fifty-eight. The younger of the pair was tall and skinny, the other short and round, with snow white hair. The young one’s coveralls hung loose and fell only to his shins. The other’s girth tested the seams and the zipper down the front of his. They couldn’t look more different in size, age, and ethnicity. Not five minutes after Warwick heard the buzz of the door downstairs and saw the blokes enter with a huge refrigerator they deftly and impressively pushed across the floor and loaded into the elevator, Dom was at it again.

Eee-er, eee-er, eee-er, eee-er.

Thud!

Thud!

Thud!

It seemed like the man could charm the pants off anyone. Literally. A couple of conservatively dressed parishioners from a local church came a-knocking on Warwick’s door around a quarter past five. A woman and a man, each had donned a cardigan despite the late summer heatwave. Watching on the monitor, Warrick saw the female of the duo head his way, while the gentleman took the corner to knock on 11-B.

Warwick was sure to be polite when visitors from the church or other religious affiliations came by. He also always asked their views on homosexuality. That day was no different. He posed his question right after responding with, “Uh, yeah,” when the woman from the church asked if it seemed to him the world was going off the rails.

In answer to Warwick’s question, she said, “We’ve been taught to hate the sin and not the sinner.

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